Betrayal

So as many of you know, this year has been extremely difficult for me. I've had a lot on  my plate with work. On Friday, my co-worker quit. Now this may not seem like that big of a deal, but I wasn't there on Friday. She didn't even tell me she was going to quit. She just did it. At our school, we work so closely together that if that was me who was quitting, I would have informed my partner before I told the principals. But, she didn't. In fact, she just wrote me an email for me to read on Sunday night. This morning I told her my feelings. I explained to her that how she went about communicating to me she quit really hurt. She could have called Thursday night. She was so rude and just said, "ok." Luckally our principals were understanding. They let me go home. She said I was selfish. I was only thinking of myself. All I was trying to do was tell her my feelings. I understand she needed to quit for her family. I would do the same. But, to respond to me, her friend like that, really hurt. It took a lot for me to tell her how I felt. Quitting affects everyone, not just yourself. I've never felt betrayal until now. In mind I keep hearing, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." I know God is right here, in control. He sees the bigger picture. He has a plan for my classroom. I'm also reminded of the verses Pslam 118:8-9 that tells us that it is not wise to put your trust in men. It is better to put your trust in God, He is our refuge. God will never disappoint us. Even though this school year has been a mix of difficult parents, students, and long hours, I know I have forgotten to trust God in these areas. I have trusted that my partner would be with me and help me through the hard moments together. That is what a partner is, right? However, men will let you down. I have been let down. How great is God that He will always stand by my side. He is who I need to fully trust through the hard times. I can't rely on humans. 

I wish I could change how things were handled. I don't know why she chose not to tell me. Was she afraid? Did she think I wouldn't be upset? I need to respond in a loving matter. Even if she never tells me she was wrong, I need to try to accept that is how she is. I pray that our classroom will be blessed with a new teacher. Maybe my old partner will return!! 

I leave this blog with lyrics based upon verses in Romans 11:33-36. "God is God and I am not. I can only see a part, of the picture He's painting. God is God and I am man. I'll never understand it all, for only God is God."