Today's brunch inspired me to get real. Being a Mom is hard. There are so many things great about being a Mom. But recently I've found out it is SO easy to loose your identity. I'm known as Deric's wife. I'm known as Sophi's mom. What about before that? I was very hard working, eager to learn, fun, goofy, and most importantly- my relationship with God was very close.
I don't know how it happened..somewhere between pregnancy, birth, and current life I've been forgetting who I was. It has been so easy to only read baby books, listen to baby music, talk about baby things. I want to sleep instead of talk or read my Bible. I want to cry instead of taking a shower. I want to eat instead of working out. And, yes, it's difficult to admit, I want to leave the house instead of spending "time" with my husband.
I've been really working hard this week not to be such a Debbie Downer. I've done some deep cleaning that I've been making excuses about no doing. I've worked hard at being HAPPY and full of joy when Deric comes home. But still some things are really difficult. I keep thinking, "if only my face would stop breaking out and I could wear my size 6 clothes again and my hair was dyed and my skin was tan, everything would be okay."
I don't really have anything encouraging, just to say I'm a work in progress. I'm trying to find me again while being Sophi's mom and Deric's wife. Those things I wouldn't trade for anything. :)
Friday, June 5, 2009
Being a Mom is hard
Posted by Jessica and Deric MIller at 6:11 PM
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3 comments:
Jess, I am so there. I have been having a hard time lately and it's just nice to have friends who are feeling the same way! I think I've tried so hard to keep it together (so people think I'm supermom) and I've definitely lost myself in the process. I will be praying for you :)
Hi Jessica, I met your husband at lunch while I was eating with my husband. I guess they went to school together Heart to Heart.. and Evy is my sister in law... my husband's name is David Noland... anyway! I have been looking at your pictures and I have to say you are a beautiful woman of God! You may feel down and depressed but pure joy fills your face when you are around your man or your baby! My Gracelyn is over 7 months now and it does just feel like yesterday. Fun stages have come and gone. sitting up, crawling, solids and now two front teeth and trying to pull herself up on anything!
I don't know one mama who is completely back to the way she was... we not only carried these precious children for 9 months, but delivered them AND tend to them 24/7 of of course it was So worth it but we have changed physically, mentally, emotionally and for the better just the way God had planned! (I too have left over baby "love") ;)
The thing that stands out to me is your faith. You seem to have such a sweet heart and sensitive soul.. given to you only by Our Lord! You are inspiring and you are encouraging! Thank you for your faith! I hope that you find peace and strength... it IS hard to be a momma and a wifey... and work! Keep doing what you are doing the Lord has truly blessed you which you already know!
Blessings to you three :)
Remember the Lord is SO proud and SO incredibly in love with you and just the way you are!
The Noland Family
Thanks girls for your sweet encouraging words and prayers. :)
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